Bakit Hindi Ako Favorite ng mga Magulang Ko?

I stumbled upon Kim Chiu's movie na Bakit Hindi ka Crush ng Crush mo on Youtube.  I'm not a fan of Filipino movies but I do watch them pampa-feel good. Bawas homesick.  So ganon, tinapos ko yung movie, sumobra ako sa aking data plan, pero really, the movie was just about Kim and Xian.  Actually I find it disturbing.  Dapat hindi ganun yung mga movies natin.  Pinapakitang OK na ang walang values!!! Nagmeet lang sex na agad? OK ang pekpek shorts? OK maging bading? OK magsabi ng paksheet? haaay sad for the new generation.  Ang sad talaga.

Pinanood ko din ang 4 sisters and a wedding. Kulit ng asawa ko, tanong ng tanong kung maganda.  Ang sagot ko...asa ka naman sa Filipino movie.  Feel-good lang pre! Walang basagan ng trip (I sound like Toni Gonzaga na).  Well actually, there is a hidden story in this movie.  It's when Connie explained why she had favourites amongst her children.  She said "I gave most of my attention to your eldest sister and youngest brother because they were weak, always sick.  But that does not mean I love them more or they are my favourites.  I love you all the same."   Tulo ang iyak ko... tinawanan lang ako ng asawa ko.

In my own family of 5 sisters and 1 brother, we all envy our eldest sister.  She's mama and papa's favourite.  When I left Baguio for a job in Laguna, I was so hurt that my papa did not even accompany me when I moved there.  Nakitulog pa nga ako sa girlfriend ng kaibigan ko sa Manila.  First time ko mameet yung tao.  Lungkot lungkot ko!  Then my sisters informed me later that our papa went to Batangas to search for our cousins and to check how they are.  Ouch! Mas pinapahalagahan pa niya yung mga hindi niya anak.

I confronted him after about a year because my heart was so heavy.  He explained to me, "You are strong.  You can make your own decisions.  I know you can make it on your own so I did not make the effort." 

Papa was right in his statements.  I am on my own now.  At yung mga pinsan ko, nandun asa parin sa papa namin.  At si eldest Sister, favourite parin =)

Now that I have two kids, I consciously make efforts to ensure that I do not have favourites.  But I guess, my daughter envies the time I spend with her younger brother.  I had to explain once to her that her brother needs more attention as he is just a baby.   

I am thankful that I have my Heavenly Father who does not have any favourites. 

Update on IPL Burns

When I got burned, I quickly searched on the internet if my case was hopeless.
There were so many cases and theirs were more severe than mine.
Most of the responses for those who were crying for help were to see a certified dermatologist.  That did not help at all I guess, not for me.
None of those who had the burns updated their cases.  So I feel that I need to provide update on my case so I could be of help to anyone who needs this information.

My burning session was on July 13, Saturday.  Since the clinic was closed on Sundays, I was only able to make my complaint on Monday.  Ms. Eve, the "manager" assessed my burns and arranged for treatment.  They would give me free scar lightening treatment until my scars totally fade (verbal agreement).  Treatment will be once a week.

Immediately, they treated my scars.  I keep on asking what treatment they are going to do but no one is giving me a clear answer.  They just say it is same as Acne scar treatment (then they should've just given me Retin A, it faded all my acne scars).  The treatment starts with exfoliation.  STOP! for fresh burns, you should not exfoliate duh! Oh, good thing I did my research.  Next step is to apply AHA to remove dead skin cells - that's according to their 20-ish old therapists.  You should feel some tingling sensation re: ACID.  I did not feel anything.   Next they apply oil to the scars.  They only explain that the oil would help in healing.  On top of the oil, they apply Vitamin C mask to lighten the scars.  I needed to ask repeatedly before they tell me what they are doing.  To me, it is a sign of lack of knowledge.  I do not blame the therapists, it is the lack of training given by the clinic.

On my second treatment, I still had the blood clots.  I was feeling desperate.  So I again asked to see Ms. Eve, they gave me lame excuse that she is busy with a client.  I grumbled and they gave me a bottle of Rose Hip oil with a little bit of oil inside.  So this is the healing oil they were using.  I googled it and some attest to it's scar lightening effect....but may take a loooooong time. 

Third week, majority of the blood clots have scaled off.  Some scars are dark while some are light.  I finished off the oil so I was given (after I persistently asked) a small amount of healing cream. 

This week is my 7th treatment.  They have actually advised me to reduce the treatment to once per month. No way! And I asked why Ms. Eve was not checking on my treatment progress...another lame reason. She was supposed to be busy setting up another branch.  Where? I asked.  Uhm, not yet final.  So unprofessional!

I had another session of IPL last week, I had to upgrade to the cold IPL.  No promotion price for me??? I rest my case.  As long as I did not hurt anyone, I am fine with it.  I hope they are fine too.

My scars have lightened, one would need to stare at my legs for a long time to recognize them.

Other things I used in order to speed up my recovery include Aloe Vera Gel and Lightening moisturizers with UV protection.  I also restricted myself to using pants for one whole month.

***

God’s Amazing Faithfulness

This is my testimony on God’s faithfulness!

I have been a Christian since young.  I don’t really remember when exactly I invited Christ to my life. It could be when I was 8 or 10 years old.  I grew up as a member of a Southern Baptist Church.  I was a lost sheep when I left Baguio and worked in Laguna.  When I moved to Singapore, on my first week, God placed me into a cell group from Hope Filipino Church.  My faith was restored, strengthened and used by God.  For three months that I was unemployed, I gave my all to cell group ministry.  I treasure those times very much and if given the chance, I will willingly devote my life to ministry.  What joy it is to be serving the Lord. I even performed for the musical presentation of the church’s anniversary.  It was tough as I already started working and still went to practices.  I would be home at 1 am from daily activities like practice, prayer meeting and cell group.  God was faithful enough, he brought me back to His flock first then gave me a job, brought my family over to Singapore and even granted us Permanent Residency.  Life is tough in Singapore but God was right there guiding me and making me see Him and feel Him.  It took a long time for my husband to secure a job, then recession came, I survived several rounds of retrenchment, still, on our third year in Singapore, we were able to loan a flat from the government. We had our second child.  In fact, both of us are not enjoying high pay.  Everything is just right as God provides.  On my fifth year in my company, I have decided to find another job.  So I prayed to God.  He let me go through 4 interviews where I was not successful.  And then I cried out to Him, that I really wanted a move.  I started reading Pastor Joseph Prince’s daily devotion.  I noticed that the messages were to make your Faith stronger.  There was one message that taught me to NOT PLEAD with God. I should not pray “Please God!” as my God is so powerful, no need to beg.  So I challenged my faith and God one day by saying, some company will give me a call soon.  At that time I was not sending any applications but I told God, all those past applications will be working.  The next week, I got a call for interview.  Oh I was so happy.  Not because I have an interview, but because I know God is really listening to my prayer.  After the first interview, I read as Pastor Prince wrote that you’ll have to really believe that what you ask for will happen.  You can even command God to do things for you because you deserve it as His child.  Hhhmmmm let me try.  Each time I see my phone, I would pray.  God, make this phone ring for my second interview.  I did that for about 3 days.  Surely, the call for my 2^nd interview came.  I was rejoicing! So happy that God is so REAL.  I confirmed to myself that I will get the job after the second interview.  While walking towards the company, I was praying, God, this job is for me, you are bringing me to this new opportunity, you have already answered my prayer.  I prayed with so much conviction.  After the interview, I was informed that there are still other candidates.  My heart sank…I walked home feeling defeated but my heart was at peace, thanking God instead for His revelations to me.  I kept on praying for God’s plan.  He’s been with me through my 6 years in Singapore, so close to me, I felt Him every day.  A month later, I received a call for 3^rd interview.  To prevent any further dismay, I just told God that I will follow His will, His plan.  2 days later, the job offer was sent to me.  God surprised me! The offer is much more than I was asking for.  The offer came on the day my company announced that our Singapore factory will be closed in 9 months time.  Still God gave me a choice, I was asked to stay as the factory is being subcontracted, I would still be the main player to manage.  But I didn’t look back, I wanted something fresh in my career.  The 2^nd week in my new company was difficult. I have read through the training materials there is nothing much to do.  I saw that there is actually not much future for me.  They all welcomed me with negative comments on the company, on the system, they had comments and warnings about the people I was to work with.  I swallowed hard…and cried!  I want to be back where I was accepted, where I was recognized, where I know anything you would ask me about.  Not here, I do not know anything!   It’s been a month and a half and each day I cling on to God alone.  I am scared but He tells me to fear not!  He makes me remember that over the past 6 years, I’ve also feared so many things but He was always there.  Never leaving me behind.  Right now I am also away from the flock, but even I am a lost sheep, I am still important to my Shepherd.  I can hear His guidance.  God is amazing!